Facebook(ing)

Like most students, I have a profile on Facebook.

I don’t have a Livejournal or a Xanga, and, God willing, I never will, but I do have a WordPress.  I had a Blogspot.  And in the long ago, I had sites hosted on Angelfire, Tripod, and Spree.

But I still have my Facebook.

I like Facebook.  I am not ashamed to admit it.  Some people will hide it, cover it up.  “I’m only on there because X and Y are on there.  If they weren’t, trust me, I’d be gone so fast!”

Z appears upset because he’s last.  How sad.

I embrace it.  I love it, in fact.  When meeting people, it helps answer simple questions and kills boring small talk.  Believe me, there is nothing I hate worse than having to badger someone I just met for their home address, but thanks to the Internet, information is instantaneous.  What may have taken years and social connections to learn, what may have once required speaking and social skills can be gained with a few clicks and a few seconds of patience.

God bless Facebook.

However, there are a few problems I have, a few chinks in the armor I have noticed, and now I would like to give the Facebook Overlords a few suggestions to make me happier.  Let’s face it: if Facebook developers are not thinking of ways to please me, then they’re not doing their jobs.

First off, to the developer of Top Friends: obey the superlative.  It is not for your four, eight, or upwards of thirty-two “BFFs”.  Best is a superlative meaning better than all others in the given context.  There cannot be more than one.  I can tolerate two.  Maybe even three.  But anything greater than that is a travesty that cheapens the honor a title like “BFF!! OMG!!” grants its rare recipient.  I only have one.  Developers and users, follow suite.

Secondly, people should have more options.  They should be able to change the names of different functions.  Instead of Photos, why not Pictures? If they’re a painter, Portraits.  Confident painter? Masterpieces.  The title should accurately reflect what lurks inside.  If the user has yet to upload any photos, then Nothing or Photos Coming Soon…to satiate the salivating masses.

You should be able to place your Friends list into different categories.  Why not Friends and Enemies? Or a Death List, quite useful for assassins.  I feel that is a niche market Zuckerburg has overlooked, one ripe for the picking.

Assassins.  They’re not just here for Networking and Random Play.

Those are just a couple ideas.  I will leave the major decisions to you big decision guys.